Dear loved ones, as I mentioned before anyone who is interested enough to read what I am writing here is a loved one, sorry if that makes you uncomfortable but please relax, we will share this love over the ether and no physical contact need take place unless we make it happen. Smiley face.
I wanted to write something profound about this twin flame journey, but I’ve got nothing, blank, zip, nada…. Maybe I shouldn’t be writing anything here, instead probably should just rest in bed and drink my coffee and listen to and watch my favourite utube videos (Emmerson36911) and read other people’s words of wisdom in their blogs (Unbolt Me). Soak it all up before I have to go out to another day of hard labour. Just joking about the hard labour, it is hard and it is labour but I love it anyway, I love my job because I’m with people, helping people, being friendly and maybe a smile will cheer someone else up and change their energy and raise their vibration.
Yesterday I felt very different while at work, tears were rolling down my cheeks and I was hard pressed to crack a smile. One regular customer (a very sweet older woman) asked if I was okay and if there is anything, she could do for me. I just gave her a hug and said I was only sad today and the hug helped. She was happy to give and get a hug too. Why was I sad and crying? You already know the answer, yes, I was missing my Divine Masculine and I almost messaged him to tell him how sad I was, but thank god I could stop myself and just wrote the words on a little scrap of paper and then tossed it away.
I thought I was over all this nonsense (the crying and the pain), and I am for the most part. What set me off was seeing all the Valentine decorations around the store and the heart shaped boxes of chocolates and I realized that not once has a man in my life taken me out and asked me to be their Valentine and made a big deal about how much they love me. Not once! This year will be no different and I can’t expect any of that from my DM since we are not speaking (I don’t call one- or two-word text messages speaking that’s just annoying). What the fuck is wrong with him!
Calm down Summerhill, he is just doing what he needs to do in his life and that’s it. I am going to go out dancing on Valentine’s day with friends and I don’t eat chocolates so I don’t need a box. I’ll throw some paint around, on a canvas of course, and see what a beautiful mess I can make, and who cares how it turns out. Everything is how it should be. Thank you for listening and reading. I love you all very much, and I really mean it.