Is it Wednesday or Thursday?

Unfinished painting by Summerhill Lane

Is this Wednesday or Thursday?

Dear loved ones,

I have lost track of the days and am sinking into a sea of despair.  Please feel free to skip this post today as I don’t want to bring you all down.  I know I will be okay again, but for whatever reason I need to purge and release. 

I have been working on a painting of my ‘friend’, who I like very much.  I think the painting is finished but will leave it a few more days on my easel before I put a transparent sealer on it as a finishing touch.  You may remember this friend of mine from the ‘No Strings Attached’ series, but it doesn’t matter if you remember him or not. 

I stopped my relationship with him when my divine masculine asked me to be only for him and not share myself with anyone else and to keep my legs closed.  I broke it off with him and said to find himself another sex partner or a girlfriend.  He said he didn’t want anyone else and would wait for me. 

He has messaged me a few times since we have been in lockdown but he hasn’t tried to carry on any kind of conversation.  If he likes me so much why doesn’t he just talk to me?  I don’t understand.  It just proves to me that he only liked me for the sex and if there is no sex going to happen there was no need to talk. 

I really am not upset about him. It is just another trigger and is bringing up feelings of abandonment.    I was going to give you a long-winded sob story but I am not going to do that now.  I have compassion for you.  Smiley face.

‘Pull yourself together Summerhill, and maybe start another painting’.

Thank you for reading my blog post today even though it was about nothing and not sexy at all.  I love you.  Hugs & Kisses, Summerhill Lane

Published by summerhilllane

contact me by email - summerhilllane2@gmail.com

32 thoughts on “Is it Wednesday or Thursday?

  1. Hi my friend. You know I suffered with horrible abandonment issues for years. I basically raised myself in an extremely crazy environment. All of us have a story and it is ok to feel badly and to feel hurt. I am sure you have a lot to offer someone and your personality, your feelings and conversations matter. I would try and stay strong if you can. If this guy isn’t grateful to talk to you he is likely not the right person. I think lots of people are feeling a bit stressed right now it is normal. You don’t have to apologize for your feelings. They matter. Take care of yourself. Sending love and prayers. 🌺🌸❤️Joni

    Liked by 5 people

    1. Oh Joni, you are so special and adorable. Thank you for your words of encouragement. Very much appreciated. Sending you lots of love ❤️
      Yes everyone is going through their stuff these days for sure 😊

      Liked by 2 people

      1. hehe, I was a wrestler. I can handle choke holds. But I much prefer the loving kind of hug. A little tight is a-ok. 😉 Sending another back your way. But not too tight, just…. you know, nice and close. 🤗

        Liked by 1 person

  2. The last time I checked my discernment, it was completely normal to fear uncertain in uncertain times.

    This is not a normal situAtion we’re in. My best advice is the reduce your intake of mainstream reality. Dat shit ain’t real.

    Invent your own, like your artistic creations. You can be anyone and anyway you choose. Enjoy the adventure of not seeing or living as others do.

    I wasted most my young adult living in accordance with realities that were my own.

    But reality is infinite. It’s whichever one you choose to believe.

    You are very talented.

    Kevy

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Dear Kevy, I like your approach to this world situation and I agree that we cannot base our reality on mainstream media which is only given us as a program and is mostly fake or stretched pretty thin. Thank you for liking my art. Sending you love ❤️

      Like

      1. These are crucial times.

        Beware of distractions from you enduring through it all.

        Beware of mainstream people too.

        …now appearing in your family and in your crew.

        Most mean well but are on a completely different vibration. They can’t change their frequency.

        Don’t give up yours.

        Love back to you, blessed, then multiplied
        Kevy Michaels

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Beautiful woman, our sexual relationships are sweet but shouldn’t define us or our happiness. Don’t be sad for too long. Life is full of opportunities to explore or repair. Just don’t be sad for too long. Xx

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Amazing artwork, love the colours and the dark but ripe aliveness in the way you painted the face. Also I like your brief retelling and explaining of your story. Hugs xoxoxox

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you beautiful Lia for liking my art. This portrait is of someone I wrote a few stories about “no strings attached”, and I consider him a friend even though we are not lovers anymore. He keeps himself closed off that is why I painted him dark, but he is very much alive and fresh. If that makes any sense. Sending you love ❤️

      Like

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